in my view yes we should.yes its the womans
body.yes its the woman that has to give
birth.but a lot of women take it on their own
backs to have an abortion,without the concent
of the male (which to me is rather
selfish).in my view,the father of the child
should be asked whether he agrees to it or
not,or maybe even be at the abortion )except
in exceptional circumstances i.e. rape).what
does everyone else think?
thats what i meant by circumstances...if its
an abusive relationship then no the man
shouldnt have a say.but i'm not so sure about
the one night stand business...might teach
them to use protection?...i dont know about
that one
classiechassie...i can see where your coming
from,but to be honest yeah i would personally
still want the child.it's a human being that
has the right to live.it aint their personal
fault that his or her parents weren't clever
enough to use protection.and it still aint
prooven that the child doesnt feel anything
when the abortion takes place.i think this
law is far too sexest.men have no rights and
parenthood is a two way thing.someone said
that most blokes wouldnt wanna know.how do
you know that unless you have asked them?and
believe me,the ones that did have doubts
would soon change their mind when they have
held the baby.
when i was only 15 i lost a child.the mother
moved away shortly after little mercedes was
born.mercedes died and i was told that she
was buried in rhyl,so i turned up at the
church...when infact she was buried in her
mothers home town in manchester.imagine how
hurt i was at that point.and thats why i
brought this question up.i personally dont
believe that men have enough rights when it
comes to being a parent.i asked my solicitor
if it was possible for me to have kept the
child because me and the mother werent
exactly lovers...response to my
question?...no chance.you are male and under
age.she was of the legal age and is the
babies mother.yes i can understand that,but
on the other hand i had a loving family for
the baby to of grown up in...she didnt.surely
love is more important than material objects
aint it?
If people dont want kids they shudnt have sex
its part of the risk. Only time i can except
the idea of abortion is rape cases the rest
make ya own bed lie in it.
Seems to me that something that can effect
both the man and woman should be made as a
joint decision although obviously with human
rights etc I'm sure it will continue to be a
womans decision and (some) mens problem.
this is a very emotive subject and everyone
is entitled 2 there own opinion. I for one do
not believe in abortion, but if i was ever
unfortunate enuff 2 find myself in such a
situation then i wud think long nd hard abt
the consequences. as for whether a man has
the rite 2 a say in such circumstances is a
difficult one 2 answer, if it is a stable
relationship nd both parties can cum 2 an
agreement, then yes the man is entitled 2 a
say, but i feel no man has the rite 2 force a
woman 2 carry a child againt her will, but
then by the same ruling surely no man shud be
forced 2 look after a child against his will.
yes the law is very one sided on this subject
nd even as a woman i think this is wrong, but
i dont see how this can ever be changed 2 the
satisfaction of both sexes, because after
all, it is the woman who has 2 go thru carry
the foetus, 2 giving birth nd this is
something that will never change, nd
ultimately she has a rite 2 say wot she does
nd doesnt do with her body
I agree the father has a right to know and
have his input into it as well. Yes the woman
has the kid gives birth but the father has
just as much right.
I think if the man wants to have an input
then thats fine, but as soon as we start
giving him the right to chose for the woman
we will have a lot of depressed women out
there. Imagine you get pregnant (by failed
contraception, whoring around, whatever - the
damage is done, no point blaming anyone) and
you don't want this kid. No way no how. Yet
your man has a part in the decision making
process and you are swayed or pressured into
not having the abortion. Does this mean you
will enjoy being pregnant and love the child
once its born? O r will you resent him and
the child. What if he decides to sod off
after a few weeks/months, tells you he's
changed his mind, doesnt really want the kid,
only stopped your termination to spite you?
So now you have an unwanted kid on your hands
because daddy daycare changed his mind?
Ultimately it should be up to the woman to
decide.
As for you losing a kid at 15, sorry for your
loss, but at 15 a boy is in no fit
circumstance to raise a kid. What kind of
pressure does that put on anyone, and whats
to say the mum didnt do a good enough job
without you? Hindsight's 20/20
i understand what you mean,after all it is
the woman who carries the child for 9
months,but imagine if you had found out that
a lady (partner or 1 night stand) is carrying
your child and you are really looking forward
to seeing the child....then she has aborted
the baby.so you have lost the baby when it
could of been born.so then (in my eyes) you
think they have murdered the baby,because
they have killed a living thing.featus or
not,it is still alive.i aint too good at
wording things,hope you understand what i
mean
i agree this subject can never be governed by
3rd parties..i believe yes from rape etc then
the woman has the final decision..when it
comes to 2 consenting adults a discussion
would be the appropriate thing to do but like
many have said before it is the woman
carrying for 9 months (blood tests, hormone
changes, sickness & labour) just part of what
she will go through..its what will happen
once the child is born it would be so easy
for the father who was so excited at 1st then
reality kicks in n they leave etc & place
extra hardship on the female...not sayin all
men are pigs but the right decision has to be
made for all their sakes & think of the
bigger picture...you see so many young women
who yes shud have kept their legs shut &
think having a baby can keep them n the man
together but proves to be the opposite..they
in my eyes did not make the right decision &
those women who do take the abortion route
discussion or not have a heart wrenching
choice but are thinkin of their n the mans
future. My sympathy does go out to the men
who would love to be a father & is taken away
from them but choices have to be made..i lost
my son at 38wks a few years ago so the loss
of a child i can relate too but as i see it
these things happen for a reason & make us
stronger & more determined if & when we do
become parents.
ıf he ıs responsıble about
hıs lıfe and can make hıs own
decıons ,female have to gıve
ınfo...
but ıf he ıs too young,drug user
etc..ı dont agree..anyway
pregnacy ıs all about female body and
effort ..
but to be parent wıth a famıly or
not ıs a great effort for both
sıde...
hello
how r u?
i am sachidanand
i am from delhi
what r u doing now these days
what about friends
sont you want to make more friends
i think u do want
if yes then ..........
i am here for u
urs friend from india
sachidanand
at the same time,dont you think there is
loads of women that regret having a baby once
it is born.i suppose in a way i'm saying that
i dont agree with abortion full stop.i
personally feel that the father should have
input.his feeling should be taken into
account.i know a few guys that are single
dads because the lady has gone once the child
has been born so it prooves that not all guys
would run.it does depend on the individual
though
At what stage does the fertilised egg become
a human being? surely not at conception, so
how long after.
As such I don't think that the father should
have a say in the abortion, because until the
fertilised egg becomes a seperate entity from
the mother it is essentially part of her
body. However I think that men should have
greater rights than they do now once the baby
is born, and particularly if the baby is a
result of a one-night stand or something then
he should definitely be informed that he has
a child.
yes its obvious that it is a part of the
woman,but it has a seperate heart beat,so to
me if you try to stop that heart beat,you are
effectively killing it.to me that makes you a
murderer.i believe that only in special
circumstances (i.e. rape or in the event that
it would harm the woman) should there be a
termination.i dont believe that you can use
one night stands as an excuse to terminate a
pregnancy...should learn to use protection.in
my opinion fathers have no rights regarding
children and that really irritates me due to
the fact that some dads would make a
brilliant parent if they were given half the
chance.and yes apapa...some men do
care,otherwise there wouldnt be a certain
organisation called 'fathers for justice'.it
begs belief that some men have to go to the
extent of breaching security just to get
their point across about their children.even
in a modern world of equal rights we still
live in the dark ages in certain aspects
well im not being funny but if poeople waited
to have children with someone they really
want have one with and are in a stable
relationship when they get pregnant, there
will/would be no need for an aborion would
there?
rape victims i feel bad for but carless
morons who dont think about consequences,
especially potential children are just
[censored]s to me.
if you dont slag about, you more than likely
wont ever have it as an issue.
exactly.contraception was brought out for a
reason,to stop innocent children being
brought into the world when they are not
wanted.if you dont want a child,then use the
contraception.its free for god sake
true that not all contraceptions are 100% but
like you say they can always take the morning
after pill as well...or wear two
condoms...painful but effective
When you even mention fathers 4 justice it
makes people laugh. Dressing up as batman or
whatever and sitting around on the houses of
parliament etc etc. Now what a fine example
of a father. They are a joke, the lot of
them.
No they shouldnt,Most guys and i stress
most,make themselves big and say there going
to be a round,then the momant they feel abit
of pressure there off.
Its a womans body and they should have that
right, and that should not be taken away
from them.!!!!!
I know a guy who comes across as v nice,
misses his kids etc, terrible wife wont let
him see them etc etc and goes on about he's a
member of fathers 4 justice. OK I thought,
he's trying his best for the kids whatever.
Only to be told by his entire family that he
beat up his wife and kids. Sometimes the mask
of lunacy fits the lunatic.
Anyway, I'm sure thats off topic and many
batman costume donning dads are fine
upstanding chaps.
A very open question to which I will answer
it two ways.
Yes the father should have a say, especially
if the relationship is long term or even
married. For without his input there wouldnt
be a foetus to start with. It is very easy to
forget that the father has feelings too, and
is hard for them too with such a harsh
decision.
However, no they shouldnt if they were a one
night stand. For many that have been in this
situation its not fair to bring the child
into the world with only one parent. However
those girls that do it constantly should be
given sex education to stop it happening, and
in the end told no, this isnt the way out,
and go througha full time pregnancy.
so you would tell someone no, you have to
have his kid?
I hate the way abortion is used as birth
control but I dont think OK you have to have
this one is the right attitude. If I was
pregnant and did not want the baby for
whatever reason and had my heart set on an
obortion, noone could prevent me from not
having the baby. You can go abroad and have
it done, go private in UK, get drugs from
internet or other sources etc etc.Just
because you got pregnant doesnt mean you have
to stay pregnant.
So you would advocate its ok to have
unprotected sex, fall pregnant and have an
abortion as a form of control? For some
people that seems ok, but for me a burden on
hospitals for a problem that can be prevented
by condoms, or not having penetrative sex at
all.
No I dont advocate it at all chloe, not just
because of pregnancy but because of the
disease risk etc. I do think there should be
provision in the law to make people have
contraceptive injections or have a coil or an
implant fitted, but that would never come to
fruition due to human rights bla bla bla. My
cousin has something like aspergers and she
should have been sterilised years ago. She's
had 3 kids, all of whom were taken away from
her, she's an addict and a waste of space.
But who would make that kind of judgement
call? Some 60+yr old catholic old fart that
fiddles with wee boys probably.
What I mean is the decision makers Chloe are
not living in the real world. The high court
judges etc who would have the final say in
that kind of case.
In my opinion, It should be a matter of
discussion between the both of them... man
and woman...after all there is so many ways
to prevent a child... If the woman decision
is not to have it, then it should be
respected, at the same time the father wishes
should be listen to or even taken into
concideration but at then end do the best for
the both of them... It takes two to make a
baby.. it should take two to make the
desicion not to have it... Just my humble
opinion....
if the only way to get our point across is to
dress up as super heros and climb buildings
then so be it...this country is a shambles
regarding rights.women wanted equal
rights....thats fine.but that should be in
all circumstances, not just the ones that
women choose
If you give men the right to have a say on
abortion, you'll open a new can of worms with
"she trapped me by getting pregnant, I want a
termination done".
I think a lot of Men respect the ability to
give life to Children, and show responsiblity
in choosing their personal circumstances.
Of course there are the Wham bam, Thankyou
mam type. so Maybe one rule does'nt suit all
situations.
But it is still That part Of a man that gives
Life, and i think that does deserve "rights"
If the woman didn't want the child but the
fella did, wouldn't that be a bit like rent a
womb?. A woman would be forced to do
something she didn't want.
A woman can feel guilt and grief over having
an abortion, if the man wanted the baby...and
it's aborted, then he'd be grieving too.
Difficult situation really.
Perhaps there should be some kind of
counselling service for both prior, to a
decision of an abortion.
Dior, we're not in the dark ages now....it's
rare for women to die in childbirth these
days, also some women are natural mothers and
some are'nt.
I've known elderly women who were career
women, and never had children....they
regretted it later in life.
If i'm right there are 2 forms of abortion
operations.The early stage one which can only
be used if the woman is under 9 weeks
pregnant in this case they are given a tablet
taken orally and then they insert the second
tablet into the womb and it kills the foetus
and the woman has the feeling of having very
bad period pains.The second is where the
woman is given a general anesthetic and they
vacum remove the foetus from the womb which
happens in like seconds.
There are over two hundred
thousand abortions in the united kingdom
every year and most of them are young girls
between 12-17 yrs old.That works out at about
an abortion about every 2-3 mins a day there
is an abortion performed.
It takes Two to be in a relationship, if
Abortion was essential then of course the
partner should be there to give support for
that horrible choice.
But every scenario is different for all
people, and of course Abortion has different
values for both men and women.
I am sure that the reallity is that both
partners would choose abortion as the last
resort.
Why would a male want abortion anyway??
Only once in my experience has this come up
and it was an Ectopic Pregnancy.
personally I would never insist on a "right"
to an abortion.
Life is a Miracle
You can flip that question round fsm and ask
why would a female want an abortion?.
Like you said, different situations and all
that but it still comes down to those few
that would "abuse" the rules etc....if men
did have a right to have a say in abortin....
I can see your point chilli, but thats a
topic thats been argued for many years.
what value on Life Huh, thats the individuals
conscience. and medical neccessity and other
aspects to consider
what if the man made some kind of lawful
promise that he would take the child once it
is born?chilli makes some good points but
like fsm said,it takes two to make the
baby,so surely it should take two to decide
whether it should be aborted or not.and as
far as men taking advantage of that fact and
maybe 'holding it against' the woman,i hate
to go back on it, but maybe he or she should
of used protection.at the end of the day,if
you dont want a child then you shoudnt have
unprotected sex.yes accidents do happen,but
at that point it should be a joint decision
as to what should happen.i know i'm repeating
what i have said before,but women were the
ones that wanted equal rights.i believe that
should be so in all circumstances.the man (in
my opinion) should have the right to have a
say in whether the child should be aborted or
not.if the man can promise that he would take
care of the baby once it is born then i cant
see the problem,and by promising i mean being
able to provide suitable information to say
that the child would be brought up in a
safe,loving environment.yeah i know that
there are sometimes problems with birth,but
doctors always keep an eye on people that
might have that problem.that should be
classed as a special circumstance,and i did
mention before that i believe special
circumstances should be classed as things
like rape or where it would be harmful to the
ladies health
One thing hasnt been explored, is that how
would the man feel if this was the one and
only chance to have a child?
Many couples go through life not being able
to conceive, some only ever get that one
golden chance.
We can all say its our bodies, we do with it
how we like, but surely if we had sex , and
fell pregnant, then the man should be
consulted.
Now this is rare for Cloe, sticking up for
the males, but imagine how they would feel if
they werent consulted, and this was there
only ever chance to have a child in the
relationship.
Surely then in a relationship, both parties
should sit and discuss the idea of abortion?
Surely if the relationship is strong, then
having a child isnt a bad option, and if it
was rocky why have the pleasure in the first
place and run the risk?
Dont forget that pregnancy is frought with
hassles, and miscarrages are quite common,
and that is natures way of terminating the
child.
Like i said up in the thread, there are times
when yes, and times when no.
I dont think we will ever get common ground
on this discussion. And if you want my
opinion, then yes men should be asked, as it
was them that fertilised the egg in th e
first place, and it is half them.
my husband went 2 the doctors to book a
vasectomy and had 2 make a 2nd appointment 2
take me along and give permission 4 this op
but during my pregnancies i could of had a
abortion without him being informed never
mind permission, sexist eh
So basically a fella should be allowed to
over ride what the pregnant woman wants,
force her in to 9 months of pregnancy,
hormones all over the place, body shape
changed, possibly get stretch marks, go
through either natural or c-section birth,
hand the baby over to the fella and then just
get back to every day living, having to
explain to people where the baby is and why
she didn't keep it etc...
If the fella didn't want the baby, over ride
what the woman wants and make her abort?.
Just doesn't seem right to me. Too many
different situations to apply any sort of
sense to make it a feasible Right for men to
have a say in terminations.
no what i mean is if the woman wants the
baby,fine.but if she didnt but the father did
and could provide suffiient enough evidence
to say that the baby would be brought up in a
caring,safe and loving environment then i
think we should have the right to stop the
abortion.as explained by the lady
before,women have to give permission if we
want a versectomy,so you have a say over our
body.equal rights would surely suggest the
same
exactly.ive been trying to contact the
government to ask for their reasons why this
is so but they have not replied yet.sent two
letters and two emails
exactly apapa you dont need 'the fathers'
permission...so why should we need your
permission to have a versectomy?its our body
that the woman has the final say over but we
cant have the final say over the womans...how
is that fair?its a case of 'whats yours is
mine and whats mine is my own' i think
- Home Page
- Forum Posting